It's the Music!!
It’s the MUSIC!
Music is the harmonic connection between all human beings... hummm...It’s God’s reminder that there is more out there than just us... hummm... -- August Rush --
October 31, 2005. Halloween. Ya’ll should know this date this isn’t my first time mentioning this, but for those are new to this, we lost my sister that day. This is the way I have always seen it.
Lost, gone, never again to be seen by us, disconnected. Well, this isn’t exactly the correct way to approach the situation, but for the past 2 years this is how I have, so why cry over something you can’t get back anyway? You have no control over who lives and who dies, who stays and who goes... away... forever. The connect was lost between us, I think...
My sister was the one who, without realizing it put the music in me. She always went to sleep at night with the radio on, we shared a room until I was 13 years old. She always played the music while she got dressed, while she cleaned, while she cooked, of course in the car the radio was always on. The music was always there so when I got my own, I did as she, played the music. I would play her music. Her tapes, her CDs, when she wasn’t home I would go in her room and play her radio, while dancing and singing around her room. She hardly ever got mad, it was entertaining for her to watch I guess. She would laugh and tell me to keep on going what I was doing. *smile* When I joined the choir at church, when we ministered, I would always watch her from the choir loft to see how the music moved her. I could see the feeling of approval in her eyes, I could feel what she felt because of the music. I could hear it in her voice.
When I moved away, to Atlanta, I took a piece of her with me, the music. When I got my own I did as she, in my dorm room at Clark Atlanta, I played my radio when I dressed, when I studied, when I cleaned, when I was doing nothing at all I was listening to the music. It was our connection to each other. It’s what has always keep me going knowing that through the music we are always connected to one another.
When she passed, she took a piece of each of us with her. She always knew how to make me feel like I could conquer the world. While everyone else doubted my survival in the big city, Atlanta, she told me otherwise. When she passed she took a big piece of my confidence, a piece of my soul. It makes me crawl inside myself whenever I’m in a position where I feel alone. I can’t hear the music anymore! Not when I’m alone! 6 months after she died, I had to get the music back, I had to get my sister back the only way I knew how...
I was on the verge of giving up on God, giving up on faith. He shattered whole world when he took her from me, nobody but one person ever knew how this really effected me, everybody else thought I was being strong for the family. NOT THE CASE AT ALL! It was a mask! I was ready to give up... without the inspiration to go on why bother right. My passion was gone! But then, there came a Sunday when there it was again. The connection, the music, the passion... But yet I still cry at night, why? I can almost feel her when I sing, I can almost see her when I listen...
If music is the harmonic connection between all human beings then what happens when you lose a human being, does the music just stop? I don’t think so. I believe that music is the connection between us all no matter where we are in the life (or death). I sing because I know that she is listening. Everybody that hears us sing isn’t always listening, but I know that she is always listening...
And maybe this is why I cry?! It’s the music, it’s playing in my soul all the time and as long as it’s playing, she will be there to listen.
IT’S THE MUSIC!!!
Music is the harmonic connection between all human beings... hummm...It’s God’s reminder that there is more out there than just us... hummm... -- August Rush --
October 31, 2005. Halloween. Ya’ll should know this date this isn’t my first time mentioning this, but for those are new to this, we lost my sister that day. This is the way I have always seen it.
Lost, gone, never again to be seen by us, disconnected. Well, this isn’t exactly the correct way to approach the situation, but for the past 2 years this is how I have, so why cry over something you can’t get back anyway? You have no control over who lives and who dies, who stays and who goes... away... forever. The connect was lost between us, I think...
My sister was the one who, without realizing it put the music in me. She always went to sleep at night with the radio on, we shared a room until I was 13 years old. She always played the music while she got dressed, while she cleaned, while she cooked, of course in the car the radio was always on. The music was always there so when I got my own, I did as she, played the music. I would play her music. Her tapes, her CDs, when she wasn’t home I would go in her room and play her radio, while dancing and singing around her room. She hardly ever got mad, it was entertaining for her to watch I guess. She would laugh and tell me to keep on going what I was doing. *smile* When I joined the choir at church, when we ministered, I would always watch her from the choir loft to see how the music moved her. I could see the feeling of approval in her eyes, I could feel what she felt because of the music. I could hear it in her voice.
When I moved away, to Atlanta, I took a piece of her with me, the music. When I got my own I did as she, in my dorm room at Clark Atlanta, I played my radio when I dressed, when I studied, when I cleaned, when I was doing nothing at all I was listening to the music. It was our connection to each other. It’s what has always keep me going knowing that through the music we are always connected to one another.
When she passed, she took a piece of each of us with her. She always knew how to make me feel like I could conquer the world. While everyone else doubted my survival in the big city, Atlanta, she told me otherwise. When she passed she took a big piece of my confidence, a piece of my soul. It makes me crawl inside myself whenever I’m in a position where I feel alone. I can’t hear the music anymore! Not when I’m alone! 6 months after she died, I had to get the music back, I had to get my sister back the only way I knew how...
I was on the verge of giving up on God, giving up on faith. He shattered whole world when he took her from me, nobody but one person ever knew how this really effected me, everybody else thought I was being strong for the family. NOT THE CASE AT ALL! It was a mask! I was ready to give up... without the inspiration to go on why bother right. My passion was gone! But then, there came a Sunday when there it was again. The connection, the music, the passion... But yet I still cry at night, why? I can almost feel her when I sing, I can almost see her when I listen...
If music is the harmonic connection between all human beings then what happens when you lose a human being, does the music just stop? I don’t think so. I believe that music is the connection between us all no matter where we are in the life (or death). I sing because I know that she is listening. Everybody that hears us sing isn’t always listening, but I know that she is always listening...
And maybe this is why I cry?! It’s the music, it’s playing in my soul all the time and as long as it’s playing, she will be there to listen.
IT’S THE MUSIC!!!
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